If you and your partner are going through a hard moment in your relationship, you may be considering relationship therapy. But you also may be reluctant to pursue it if you are asking yourself , will marriage counseling deliver the results? Nicely, right now there is no conclusive solution to that as the success of any type of counselling always depends on many various factors. Many partners do find it to be very beneficial to their romantic relationship. Other people feel it was ineffective or helped very little. This article examines some of the factors that are necessary to answer “yes” to the question, “Does marriage counseling work?”.
You both are committed to working on the relationship
An important aspect for just
about any kind of therapy or counselling to work is that the person
getting it must be dedicated to the process and to enhancing the
scenario. For partners, if only one of you is dedicated to working
through your partnership problems while the other is resistant, the
solution to the question, “will marriage counseling deliver the
results?” is more than likely gonna be“no”.
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Counseling is a collaborative
process between the client and the therapist. The greatest marriage
counselor on the planet is going to have limited success with someone
who has no desire to truly work on the relationship. It has to be a two
way street. Sometimes resistance to the therapy process can be
overcome, particularly with an exceptionally experienced and skilled
therapist, but it will be very difficult.
Another key factor with regards
to the question, “does marriage counseling work?” is whether or not you
have a counselor with whom you both feel comfortable. No therapist is a
good fit for everyone. If this is the case, you and your spouse would
be better off to find a different therapist to work with. Too much is
at stake to try to force a therapeutic relationship that doesn’t feel
right for both of you.
You are both willing to do the work
Talking in and of itself will
only go so far in terms of bringing about the desired changes in your
relationship. While it can be helpful to have a safe place to discuss
your feelings and concerns, there needs to be more. Many therapists
will give you exercises or homework to do between sessions. These
exercises help to reinforce what you are learning in therapy and give
you an opportunity to practice new skills which you can discuss each
week. The more you and your spouse participate and do the work, the more
likely the answer to your question, “does marriage counseling work?”
will be yes.
Sticking with it and tolerating the pain
Two other very crucial elements in terms of the question, “does marriage counseling work” are:
• You stick with it
• You are willing to tolerate things getting worse before they get better
A lot of people drop out of
counseling at some point. They get discouraged or don’t like the
process and assume the answer to, “does marriage counseling work?” is
“no”.
One of the primary factors
people give up happens because things frequently get even worse before
they improve. A good counselor will get you prepared for this upfront.
Marriage counseling is going to open up some wounds and address some
painful issues. In the beginning, that can seem to create much more
pain. But it is akin to the requirement of cleaning out an infected
wound so it can finally heal. The cleaning process is painful, but it
must happen or the wound will be there forever.
If all these factors is existing
for you and your spouse, then the solution to the problem, “will
marriage counseling work?”, is very often a unquestionable yes. It is
not going to be easy, and it may be a lengthy process. But if you
really would like your marriage to be strong and healthy, the benefits
are definitely more than worth it!
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